SHOUTSSSSSSSSS :

you understand anot?
I feel so irritated now.
Annoying!

I feel like dying!
Kill myself.
ARRGHS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This feeling so sucks!

You know I never sweet talk.
You know I never say mushy words.
You know I never show you how much I care.

DEEP IN MY HEART...
I CARE!
I MIND!
AND I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! noob shit!!!!!!

What makes you so hard to know all these?


WwEeiiiiiiii...!!!!
You understand anot?
You understand anot?
You undersatnd anot?
You understand anot?
You understand anot?
You understand anot?
You understand anot?
You understand anot?
You understand anot?
You understand anot?
You understand anot?
You understand anot?

I feel like leaving so much so much.

Whatever things I said you just don’t understand.
Why?
Every word I said to you, you must find fault inside.
Why?
You said you understand, did you?
Some things I don’t say out because I have my own reasons.
Why shout at me?
Why forced me to say?

I don’t need a boyfriend to scold me in public.

I don’t need a boyfriend to quarrel with me in public.

I don’t need a boyfriend to throw my face in the public.

I don’t need a boyfriend to call me every day for quarrel.

I don’t need a boyfriend to force me to do things I don’t like.

I don’t need a boyfriend to accusing me for two-timing.

I don’t need a boyfriend to only message and call me.

I don’t need a boyfriend who doesn’t meet me.

I don’t need a boyfriend to uses his father to force me say some things.

I don’t need a boyfriend who doesn’t understand me.

I don’t need a boyfriend who keeps repeating his wrong doings.

I don’t need a boyfriend who likes to find fault in everything I said.

I don’t need a boyfriend who blames everyone in the world when something happens.

I don’t need a boyfriend who doesn’t trust me.

I don’t need a boyfriend who doesn’t know I’m suffering.

I don’t need a boyfriend who doesn’t show considerations for others.

I don’t need a boyfriend who thinks he always right.

I don’t need a boyfriend to constantly cheat on me.

I don’t need a boyfriend to shout at me everywhere.

I don’t need a boyfriend who constantly apologizes.

I don’t need a boyfriend who doesn’t realize his mistakes.

Why things keep repeating?
I gave you last chance ever. Why still like this?
Why you never change?
Why use your dad to force me still?
Why every time you want to find fault?
Why force me?

There are several problems between us, do you know?
I know you will say bury them.
What is the use?
After all, they are still problems.

Anything can change in this world, but habits never change.

You said you read my blog.
You said you understand everything.
But, in fact, you don’t.

I’ll tell your dad for you, don’t worry.
You will still be his good son.
I will wrap all things up for you.
Then, everything will end.

I will treat as I don't have a boyfriend.

Because I know we will apart one day...

It just the matter of time only.

Because you never know your mistakes.

需要你的爱

Click: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=12M0v48G0f8



演唱:F.I.R

当你选择了云的距离
就让我我至此做决定
冲破天际飞去
排山倒海崩塌的回忆
也许我可以袭击我的心
痛得不能自己
或许你以为把这一座城市抛开
就可以纠结伤害
却不明白

我需要你的爱
不管多少阻碍
不求什么未来
不管命运会怎么安排
我会用眼泪洗去所有的不堪
狠狠地把心痛了断
深深地把一切重来

我需要你的爱
像掉进了深海
也像坠落悬崖
找不到地方可以逃开
别让那些谎言把爱给活埋
当心碎成一块一块
当爱碎成一断一断

我会等待
你的爱
哦-哦----~~

oOoOo misses oOoOo

Hmmm… I just don’t know how to say it out!

When I think of the pasts, I don’t dare to speak up. Don’t dare to touch on those sensitive issues. I’m scared. I just want to have you with me. I just want you to spare more time to spend with me. I don’t think there’s any wrong in this. The number of times we meet up a week already so less and the time we spent together is less than 24hours per week. I don’t want this. I don’t want! Yes, when we meet up we were really happy but, I hope to have more of this. I understand you have to work. I understand you have curfew. I understand. Understand. Understand! I really hope for more time with you.

Don’t have to send me home. Don’t have to spend money. Even it’s just 1hour, I also want to meet you and see you. Even its 30minutes, I also don’t mind. I don’t mind… even if you want me to travel from east to west, I don’t mind. Even if you want me to meet you very early in the morning, I also don’t mind. I don’t expect you to dote me with presents. All I want is to be with you, physically. Please, fulfil my little wish…

You heard my misses? You heard my sorrows? You feel my fears? Can you?

Sometimes, I really couldn’t breathe. The misses I have, make my everyday a sleepless night. Almost every night, I was flipping through all of our photos, our videos and our dairy. I tell myself, I meeting him tomorrow, I meeting him tomorrow. Just tomorrow! But, the tomorrow seldom fulfil. I’m sad, but I couldn’t tell. I find no words to say it out.

I know you have to work. I know. I know. I know. I know. And I fully understand. What else can I do? It just understands. I kept my misses. I kept my sorrow. I kept my fears. I shared my happiness with you. Our time is limited; I only can share my happiness with you and nothing else.

Don’t know why, I felt a sudden lost. Suddenly, I don’t know what I’m doing. Suddenly, I don’t know where to go. Suddenly, I don’t know what I want. Suddenly, I’m lost!

I want to spend my time with you but our timing doesn’t tally with each other.

I also don’t know whether he know every single things of mine. I went injection today, he knows? I so afraid of injection, he knows? He knows my fears? He knows I’m in pain? I working this Friday to Sunday, he knows? I working next Thursday to Saturday, he knows? He knows where I working? He knows what I’m working as? He knows what I most wanted now? He can feel me?

I am deaf that makes you a mute.
I'm deeply in love with you that makes me blind too.
Please, let me feel you.

I have a lot of things to say to you. A lot… but I can’t find words to say it out. So I keep it.

Pulau Ubin Trip >.<

20 Sep 2008
We went Pulau Ubin

He is my boyfriend

Departure Hall at Changi

On the boat to Pulau Ubin!!!


Girlfriends' mirror reflection

4 couples! <3333

the guys snapshot us from "tower"?

our shadow on the sea

bl0w wind blow

mei n mic bicycle spoil -

no one in this picture save the bicycle

GERALD!

The SAVIOR of mei n mic bicycle!

Captured in the toilet! XD

Wild Boar!

rabbit

me n burger

take 1!

take 2!

take 3!

Our dinner at Pulau Ubin seafood resturant -

hungry hungry hungry!

finished up in 10 min - wahh!

me n burger - on our way back to singapore

me =.=

ken n ting

Gerald n Elicia

mei n michael

WE ALL!!! =D

Back to Singapore!

Then, we went pasir ris for prawning.. hahaa!

FUN!

me and burger caught one small little pity prawn for one whole hour then we headed home first as burger got curfew =(

hmmm... have a lot of fun on this day. I'll never forget.

Lovessss Girlfriends <333

not forgetting,

Lovessss Burger tooooo! <3

Lucky lucky luck luck =D

MOOD: wahahaaa!

Last day of work 19Sep!!! heheeee....

Hmmm… just tell you guys the highlight of the day!

I was working at Plaza Sing, level One Watson’s concourse.

This morning, a sugar container with a few pack of sugar dropped down from Secret Recipe, level 3. THEN! This evening… a knife dropped down from above [Secret Recipe, level 3] too. The promoters complained to the Plaza Sing management about these scary scenes. Luckily the knife didn’t hit on anyone, if not; things will get super duper worse! And the luckiest thing was! I was right in front of the knife when it just dropped off from the above! Super lucky!!!

***GOD BLESSES ME***

Hmmm… today my beloved burger cooked fried rice and brings to PS for my lunch. Super sweet. Hehee. The fried rice super tasty! Hahahaaa. MORE PLEASE~! =)

"Missing"

MOOD: sick.

Hmmm… I had been “missing” for about 2hours today. Everyone was searching for me. I feel so guilty. I feel so sick after work ever since I start working yesterday.

I almost faint at LRT platform just now. My head was spinning and my vision was blurring. I feel so sick that as if I was floating. I wanted to fall immediately. I couldn’t take it anymore. But, I suddenly come to conscious and I took train home. My phone switched to silent mode and I was lying on my bed. My head was spinning. I totally forgot to send message to him. Then, I fall asleep on my bed.

After I woke up, I take a bath. I still don’t remember about my phone and him.

When I lie back on my bed, then I remember about them. I saw 56miss calls from girlfriends, yew suan and him and 16 messages from them plus his dad too. They all thought I something happened to me.

His dad finally messaged me. I doubt his dad wanted to message me long time ago. His dad said his son not been eating for 2 days. And asked whether we are alright? Yea, I replied. Convinced him that we are fine…

I feel so sorry about today incident. I didn’t mean to let you all worry. I really feel so sick. I don’t know what happened to me these 2 days. Maybe I was too tired. I feel like falling onto my bed now. Feel so giddy and my neck, shoulders and legs are aching like nobody business.

EXHASUTED.

can't help it!

MOOD: arrghs!

Things still not right…
He still find me out and quarrel in public.
The feeling so sucks!
Always find the best timing. Peak hour whereby the MRT is so crowded.
Such a boyfriend. “Hahahaa!”
Post about him, he not happy.
Don’t post about him, he not happy.
What he want?
I have no idea. Really.

Nothing wants to find quarrel end up, my fault. Hmmm… nothing to say.

I am rushing for time to hospital to visit my godfather. RUSHING TIME! Yet that person just doesn’t let me off. I couldn’t breathe. I feel so pressure. My godfather suddenly went into hospital and I don’t why. There that person finding faults and want me to settle before I go hospital. What is that? What you want?

Have you ever experienced someone you loved leave you suddenly?
That feeling you yet to experience, it’s all about time.
That feeling just can’t simply describe.
You never know that feeling. So scary… scary…

I am so disappointed and stressed.
Don’t want to talk to him for the time being.

My Mooncake Festival Night =D

MOOD: fun!

hmm... i just finish bathing and im here bl0gging. =))

it was really fun. one of e best mooncake festival i ever celebrated. wahahaa!
the first b0mb was really nice lahh... shawn said it was 6 storey high! w0w! hahaa. as for the second one... i din see it! ka0s! c0s there was one couple walking pass den saw me n jess taking vide0... den the b0mb g0es off like that... arrghs!!! irritating couple. opps! hahaa. but overall it was not badd lahh... hmm... ting n shawn said n0t nice... *rolling eyes* i din see the real nice bomb made by shawn before that's why... hahaa!

MY DAY ON 12SEP

MOOD: fly fly fly~

Today I went City Hall with Elicia to collect my staff ID for next week concourse.
After that, we were sitting by the water front chatting.
Hmmm.... it had been ages since we last meet up and chat for so long.

Suddenly,
I miss all my friends.
I miss my secondary school life.
I miss going out with my girlfriends.
I miss us hunting for nice food around Singapore together.
I miss us study together.
I miss us gossiping.
I miss us going school together.
I miss us going home together.
I miss us going tuitions together.
I miss us having fun together.
I miss us shopping together.
I miss us staying over at each other home.
I miss us arguing.
I miss us crying together.
I miss our laughter.
I miss us overcoming obstacles together.
I miss our never give up attitude on each other.
I love them! I love them! I love them! Many many…!

Then, we met mei and sent elicia off as she is having jap exam the next day.
Hmmm… mei and I went into “Just Noodle” restaurant.
There were 3 guys sitting next to us. They were talking about girls… they were obviously scared of their girlfriends. Hahahaa! We were laughing at their content. It was so exaggerating. I think they are JC students… because they don’t speak “our” language. [poly/ite students] Hahaa! What a great dinner I had.
Funny!

Men♂ and Women♀

A woman can forgive a man for many wrong doings but not seeing another woman behind her back.
Why men can’t be serious? Or don’t be so flirt?

When men says…
“I love you” do they mean it?
“I miss you” do they really miss?
“I need you” do they really need?
“I want you only” are they serious about us?

When women says…
“I love you” they mean it.
“I miss you” they really miss.
“I need you” they really need.
“I want you only” they are serious.

Women always complaint men are not thoughtful.
Men always reply that women are hard to understand.
Women rebut that men are too stupid to understand us.

Men love to stay inside their caves; thinking hard to solve all questions by themselves.
Women love to remain in their dreams; waiting men to react the way that women wants.

Men wouldn’t ask for help when they meet difficulties.
However, women do.
Men would solve things in a very practical way.
However, women don’t.
Men would want a direct answer.
However, women don’t.

When a man remains silent, he is thinking.
When a woman remains silent, she expects man to know.

Men are realistic.
Women are observant.

Men can’t tell what women are thinking by looking but women can.
Men tend to forget fast of all bad happenings but women never.
Men don’t talk things out but women do.

Men are bear, which live in a dark cave. No communication and uses the same old equipments to hunt for food and build their homes.
Women are birds, which fly around the world. Finding new homes when each season approaching and build homes with the limited resources.

Practically, women are deaf. That makes men to become mute.

If men cannot speak to women, what should men do?
SHOW (Actions speaks louder than words)

However, when women are in love, they are blind too.
So, make them feel that they are appreciated and loved.

*The above are my personal view only.

HELP ME!!!

erm... i'm thinking of changing my e-mail address. hmmm... i need some feedback.

ally_smx90@ hotmail.com
or
allysmx@ msn.com

which one is nicer?

my 70th posts

Actually, I don’t know how to tell everyone.
It’s hard for me to face everyone.
I care and I mind how people think about it.
But it’s going to be the last time I do this… very last time.
I promise.

Friends, let my stubbornness and mischief bring me to another phase of my life.
Friends, I know you all disagree to it.
Friends, I have disappointed you all once again.
Friends, forgive me.

*I am not the girl you see in your eyes.

Photo Session

MOOD: =DD

- Him -

My Meeting Room Scenery View

Myself in the reflection

SEE! My Meeting Room bigg hor!

One sq feet $17.50 per month. expensive...

ALLY's PHOTO

2003 (Left Up corner)

2005 January (Right Up Corner)

2006 (Left Down Corner)

2007 Sep (Right Down Corner)

2007 Dec (Left up)

2008 Jan (Right up)

2008 Mar (Left down)

2008 Sep (Right down)

Smile revealling...

MOOD: heihei heihei~

Today!!!
First day of work!
Super nervous at first... cos I reporting to a finance company... i thought i would follow up the data (which are all numbers!)

ironically...

NO! also update data... but is... update who sign in/out... hahaa...!
I was paid to sit in a 5-day meeting conduct by the company...
wahahaaa! just sit in and dont talk... that's my job...
soooooooo slaggg~~~

hmmm... i met one client who is my lecture's friend.... so coincidence...!!! hahaaa....

anywaysSs...
when someone bad mouth about somebody, seems so wrong. but when everyone bad mouth about somebody, mostly they are right!